A Moral Question.

Spikee · Post by **Spikee** » Sat Jun 10, 2006 2:55 pm

Keyser Soze wrote:I thought I would start a new thread on another issue. An age old one in fact. I guess the only reason I am doing it on this forum, even though it might be innappropriate, is because of the anonymity here and some of you have some interesting opinions. So here goes:

I am a married man, and love my wife immensly!!! I have always been faithful to her and knocked back many opportunities of casual sex with many women since being married. But recently this totally gorgeous lady is making it obvious to me that she is there available for the taking. She has also made it clear to me that she wants no commitment or involvement, just a bit of fun. I have to admit I am tempted. She is that gorgeous!!!

I fully realise that morally it's not on, but shit I am only human!! On the otherhand, my wife doesn't deserve me being unfaithful to her, even though she would probably never find out. My wife is totally committed to me and faithful without any doubt whatsoever, so she deserves the same from me. Plus if the impossible happened that my wife was ever unfaithful to me, well I'd be devestated!!!! As she would if it was the other way around. But AAAAAAGH!!! This woman trying to get it on with me is so beautiful and sexy!!!! Part of me thinks, you have only one life, grab the opportunity and part of me thinks I might not be able to deal with the guilt and that I might burn in hell for it (catholic upbringing).

Boy, you've really seen the light alright.

First you make the choice to flirt with things that you admit caused complete disaster earlier in your life, and now you're asking about soiling the sanctity of your marriage.

There's a reason why all of this activity is happening right in a row, and it's because your head, for whatever reason, is not right. If you have medical benefits I recommend talking it out with a shrink. Obviously, life's blessings to you are not enough and you need to address the cause of that instead of turning into a total self-destructive hedonist.

What's next, "I don't have enough money so I was thinking of robbing a bank"?

Spikee · Post by **Spikee** » Sat Jun 10, 2006 2:59 pm

markaugust wrote:jeez hambone... i reckon him posting here is just that, a sign of guilt... not knowing to give in or not.

No, he's looking for validation and a pat on the back. Go read his other thread that's currently circulating.

ColdPack · Post by **ColdPack** » Sat Jun 10, 2006 3:00 pm

What an idiot. Simply put... you're a fool and considering how much consideration you've given this situation, you should probably tell your wife about it anyway. Face it, you're going to do it. Maybe not this time with this woman... but you'll do it sooner or later...
Save your wife the grief and turmoil. Tell her. Let her decide to stick around to find out what happens next or see you for the jackass you are and leave you to find someone better suited for her. Someone guided by devotion to her and not guilt about hurting her.

Idiot.

cp

MrYellow · Post by **MrYellow** » Sat Jun 10, 2006 3:38 pm

I highly doubt anyone here has the right to call him a dickhead for being
attracted to a woman who wants him. Especially if things aren't great at
home.

Seeing a lot of christian BS is coming out here.... heres one....
"Let he without sin cast the first stone"

edit: oh just remembered the other thread......
Yeah he's a troll from way back....
Both threads are likely 100% bullshit.

-Ben

Angstrom · Post by **Angstrom** » Sat Jun 10, 2006 3:53 pm

christian BS?

weird, I read the whole thread but I didn't spot anyone with a christian slant at all.
theres a 50/50 mix of pop-psychology and general abuse as far as I can tell !

djadonis206 · Post by **djadonis206** » Sat Jun 10, 2006 4:23 pm

Well that sucks your married first off - you pretty much salted your own game

my advise - hit it and split, if this girl is down to kick it fuck it - you'll get over it at some point. now if you really like her than that's another story...

what your wife doesn't know wont hurt her - trust me

but you really have to say to yourself, well what if my wife cheated on me? What if she did and she has been for some time but you don't know any better

see, what you don't know can't hurt you - so take that advise - have sex or what ever with this other girl and get on with your life...get it over with

cause when you die you don't regret shit you did it's what you didn't do that will tear you apart

but another thing to think about is this girls breast size - if she's flat it's not worth it - there's a million desperate flat chicks on the planet - it
s the hot ones with DD's that are hard to come by cause every guy wants to hit it - that's on the real - I gives a fuck, my life is that shallow and empty I determine my relationships based on Breast size but I'm just being honest

Peace

DJA!

djshiva · Post by **djshiva** » Sat Jun 10, 2006 4:37 pm

Angstrom wrote:yes, you may have only one life(!) - and the promise of that grass on the other side ... mmm it looks so greeen!

but then, you have to say "who am I?" , " what kind of a man do I want to be?"
I don't mean this in some churchy bollocks way- I actually mean who do you want to be?
Tough biker poet with a string of chicks in each town?
Warrior monk who lives a penitent chaste life ?
Diletante chauvenist bi-sexual bespoke furniture maker?
Family man who tears up clubs on weekends with brutal beats?

I want you to try this little thought experiment:

Imagine yourself dead of old age, your ghost hovers above your own funeral service ... what is the eulogy? what is the content? You know the way these things go ..
"clive was the best vacuum salesman in the whole of wisconsin"
or
"he was a hero who saved many lives in the antarctic"
(etc)
Also, imagine you can read the minds of everyone there - what they think of you.
what do you want them to say, or to think or feel about you. More to the point - what do you think about yourself and whatyou represent when you imagine that situation?
what kind of man do you picture yourself as - free spirited, honest, faithful, a warrior, an artist (whatever)?

That person you think you are is your 'ultimate self', either you are aiming to be that ideal - or you are just drifting in the river of life like a dead fish going where the current happens to take you!

Some people think that we should actually welcome troublesome descisions - because only then can we test ourselves against them.
It's all very well thinking you are one thing or another, but it is only 'in battle' that you prove yourself. Are you who shaping up to be who you thought you were?

It's not morally a problem for me to say 'take either route', but you have larger issues than a nice looking girl and a few raging hormones here.

you need to look at yourself and say "who the fuck am I", whatever the answer to that is should determine what you do.

sermon concludeth

wow. thoughtful answer.

djadonis206 wrote:
what your wife doesn't know wont hurt her - trust me

ummm...bullshit.

smutek · Post by **smutek** » Sat Jun 10, 2006 4:39 pm

MrYellow wrote: That being said.... All guys cheat.
Those that don't die of stress

-Ben

The smiley makes me think you are just joking but its still total, complete and utter bullshit. I have been with my wife for six years and I do not cheat.

Boys cheat. Selfish, scared boys who have yet to grow up. It has shit to do with Christianity. If you are willing to give into some selfish urge with no regard to the devastating effect it wil have on your partner then you are definitely not a man. Or a woman.

I have yet to hear the argument against monogomy, how its some chain imposed on society by Christian dogma. I know people that live like that. Total rubbish in this case. If others want to live like that I have no problem with it, so long as they are honest with their partners right from the start. Keyser is married.

In a sense I agree with hambone. Keyser, if you are going to cheat on your wife be a fucking man and get honest about it. I understand looking at other women but if you are really that far along in this mental process you really need to do something about it before you hurt your wife. If you are not interested in saving the marraige then break it off then go and fuck whoever you want. Likely a month later you'll be crying in your bed wishing you had never done it.

Your going to cheat on your wife just to bust a fucking nut?? You are really willing to do that?

Seriously, this thread makes me sick to my fucking stomach.

I cheated on a girl friend back in '92. This girl was my soul mate and I blew it for an evening of fun. The girl I cheated with had a reputation for breaking up relationships. Of course my "new" relationship didn't last more than a month and I spent probably the next ten years wishing I had never done it.

I thought I would never find another soul mate, but I was fortunate. In that sense I suppose I grew up and I will not ever do that shit again.

I'm still friends with the girl I cheated on, she lives in another city now but we corrospond a few times a year. Its sad. She is about to turn 36. She's very successful, a great girl and should be in a committed relationship or married, but she bounces between relationships because she still has trust issues. I can't say I am totally responsible for where she is now, but I did a lot of damage because I was a selfish little prick.

People are going to be where they are, with regards to their spritual state, but I have no tolerance for that shit now, especially for people trying to justify it. It really pisses me off.

Total fucking lunacy man. Seriously, its ok to ask about advice but reading your post it seems to me you've already made up your mind. Its a selfish and cowardly thing to do dude. You need to get this out of your head and in the open with people you trust and respect (people with a solid moral grounding) and not on an annoymouse forum. I suggest you speak with some people who are close to you, in your life, and who will not co-sign your bullshit.

djadonis206 · Post by **djadonis206** » Sat Jun 10, 2006 4:56 pm

djshiva wrote:
djadonis206 wrote:
what your wife doesn't know wont hurt her - trust me

ummm...bullshit.

that's one way to look at it

let there be no mistake - I just wanted to say let there be no mistake Cartman says it all the time

I'm pissed because I deleted Tweek vs. Craig this AM by accident from my TiVo and when Tweek and Craig are sizing each other up at the weigh in Cartman's all "Let there be no mistake, Craig has been ready for this..."

Maybe I was born without a soul but I really feel like it's your life, do what you want and if your old lady isn't the wiser who cares

chicks get abortions all the time and don't tell there boyfriends (I know this to be true) - it's your body and no one has the right to tell you what to do with it and you're no less of a man because of some left / right wing opinion of mahogeny - what right do we have to tell some chick if she can abort a dead fetus - what right does anyone have over you to tell you can't have a one - off

just kick it dawg, fuck the haters - you'll be much happier in the morning

but again, only if she's a DD

djshiva · Post by **djshiva** » Sat Jun 10, 2006 5:00 pm

djadonis206 wrote:
djshiva wrote:
djadonis206 wrote:
what your wife doesn't know wont hurt her - trust me

ummm...bullshit.
that's one way to look at it

let there be no mistake - I just wanted to say let there be no mistake Cartman says it all the time

I'm pissed because I deleted Tweek vs. Craig this AM by accident from my TiVo and when Tweek and Craig are sizing each other up at the weigh in Cartman's all "Let there be no mistake, Craig has been ready for this..."

Maybe I was born without a soul but I really feel like it's your life, do what you want and if your old lady isn't the wiser who cares

chicks get abortions all the time and don't tell there boyfriends (I know this to be true) - it's your body and no one has the right to tell you what to do with it and you're no less of a man because of some left / right wing opinion of mahogeny - what right do we have to tell some chick if she can abort a dead fetus - what right does anyone have over you to tell you can't have a one - off

just kick it dawg, fuck the haters - you'll be much happier in the morning

but again, only if she's a DD

ya know, you may like good techno, but your attitude toward women is neanderthal at best. seriously, grow up.

since the thread name is "a moral question", it would be nice if only the people who actually HAVE morals answered. but this IS the internet, so i suppose that is asking far too much.

*sigh*

over it.

djadonis206 · Post by **djadonis206** » Sat Jun 10, 2006 5:07 pm

djshiva wrote: ya know, you may like good techno, but your attitude toward women is neanderthal at best. seriously, grow up.

You'd be surprised or maybe not at how many guys think like I do - I just say it out loud instead of pretending to be and think something I don't really believe

yes techno is good and I love good music - I actually like women to and when the right one comes along that makes me want to stay at home, be all monogamous and the whole nine, cool...

but until then I'm like a free agent - the one friend who's going to tell you to eat the red pill instead of the blue one and be there for you if and when the shit goes down

I'm just telling the guy what he's already thinking and not conforming to this "be noble shit" which I'm willing to bet half these fools actually believe.

or don't believe - you can pretend to be a goody two shoes just as easy as you can pretend to be an asshole on the good ole intranet

it's 10 am why am I awake - I dj'd a eastern european party last night and almost went home with this one girl who was hot but she lives with her god damn parents so me and my boy came to my crib posted some random shit all over the world via the internet and now I'm trying to program a funky bass line / lead but it's not hitting, weak dawg - I need some coffee

peace out

DJA!

Double D dawg double d

EEkevin · Post by **EEkevin** » Sat Jun 10, 2006 5:11 pm

All guys do not cheat. What is the point of being married if you don't love the person enough to be soley committed to them?

just my 0.02

-Kev

noisetonepause · Post by **noisetonepause** » Sat Jun 10, 2006 5:13 pm

Don't cheat on your wife without telling her first.

smutek · Post by **smutek** » Sat Jun 10, 2006 5:14 pm

djadonis206 wrote:Maybe I was born without a soul but I really feel like it's your life, do what you want and if your old lady isn't the wiser who cares

chicks get abortions all the time and don't tell there boyfriends (I know this to be true) - it's your body and no one has the right to tell you what to do with it and you're no less of a man because of some left / right wing opinion of mahogeny

just kick it dawg, fuck the haters - you'll be much happier in morning

but again, only if she's a DD

Total fucking bullshit dude. If thats how you want to live your life then you definitely have no place being married or in a monogamous relationship. If you want to sleep with 20 different girls then thats all good, as long as they all know that you have no intention of being faithful. If you got to lie about it then your just a selfish prick and too scared to get honest. Some people run from their shit by getting high, some by fucking as many people as they can.

People murder people in the streets everyday and dont tell people about it. Does that make it ok?

It might seem like fun and games to you Adonis, but this guy is married. Who knows if he has kids? And you tell him go for it, you'll feel better in the morning? yeah, maybe there will be more repressed guilt to run from and more hot bitches to fuck, feel better in the morning, more repressed guilt and on and on ad infinitum.

Till one day his wife finds out and is totally devastated, and the kids are wondering why Mommy's crying and their family went to shit. Then maybe he can tell them Dj fucking Adonis told him fuck the haters and to go for it.

What the fuck dude? I don't know if this guys serious or just trolling for the fuck of it. But if you are serious about what you said then I totally question your morals and lose whatever respect I had for you and your music. If you want to live like that go ahead, but don't give the same bullshit advice to others and pull them into the same misery you are in. And don't post back that you are happy go lucky because I bet inside you are not. I've read your posts man and I get the feeling that your not real happy at all.

And I could seriously give two shits if you are offended by any of that. And I could give a fuck about what you write in respnse.

Spikee · Post by **Spikee** » Sat Jun 10, 2006 5:15 pm

I simply can't believe how much infantile crap is trickling out of this thread. For those that actually think that "it's your life" and whatever, you guys are morons.

What if Keyser was married to your daughter? Would you be whistling the same tune then? For fuck's sake, it's about having principles. It's about not thinking that everything would be fine if your old lady never found out, it's about knowing that you promised to your wife for better or worse, richer or poorer, in sickness and health so it doesn't matter if she finds out or not!!

For those that are saying that which is obviously, without reproach, the correct thing, I commend you. For those that are telling this guy to break his promises and do whatever he wants, whenever he wants... I wish that I could put animal tags on you guys and track you so I at least know when your sociopathic asses are coming up on my set.

A Moral Question.

Re: A Moral Question.